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Post by debbiem on Oct 14, 2008 9:47:20 GMT 1
I was really chuckling by the time I got down to the underwear bit, and then I burst out laughing - it's so true! It's brilliant!
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Post by madonplants on Oct 14, 2008 10:18:19 GMT 1
Men Are Just Happier People-- Your last name stays put. Doesn't have to, that's 'her' decision! The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can never be pregnant. Car mechanics tell you the truth. Sometimes! The world is your urinal. Not anymore, you get fined or told to clean it up, nowadays! You never have to drive to another petrol station restroom because this one is just too icky. If only you knew! You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. Don't show any cleavage then! New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. Women don't have to wear what they wear, do they?! One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. Eh? You know stuff about tanks and engines. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. So can most women, they just want men to do it for them! You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. Your underwear is £8..95 for a three-pack. Not where I shop! Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You never have strap problems in public. Get the right size then or do the straps up properly!! You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original colour. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. Your fault again! You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. Yeah, they're called women! One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one colour for all seasons. Men don't care about fashion, just what suits them! You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife. It's illegal to carry a knife around, so I use nail clippers! You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache. Women don't look right with facial hair!! You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes. Yeah right! No wonder men are happier.
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Post by debbiem on Oct 14, 2008 11:48:24 GMT 1
Ooo Keith - I can feel a rebellion coming on. I take it that you agree with all the ones you haven't commented on then.
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Post by 4pygmies on Oct 14, 2008 14:36:12 GMT 1
Ooo I love a good old fashioned debate between the sexes.......come on then?
AND Men NEVER have to endure periods or the menopause (and don't anyone dare say they have to endure ours.....or else....)
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Post by owdboggy on Oct 14, 2008 15:19:26 GMT 1
Keith and I just wish it was true!
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Post by madonplants on Oct 14, 2008 15:36:29 GMT 1
Ooo I love a good old fashioned debate between the sexes.......come on then? AND Men NEVER have to endure periods or the menopause (and don't anyone dare say they have to endure ours.....or else....) Oh yes forgot to mention. Men shouldn't be any where near the opposite sex, when it's the wrong time of the month! Just remember it's the wrong time for both!! Do you think I got away with it, OB?
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Post by 4pygmies on Oct 14, 2008 15:56:14 GMT 1
Nope......but I am being VERY polite.... Of course I am NOT saying that the reason men are never depressed is because they (some of them) aren't very bright........I would never even think such a ridiculous thing...
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Post by madonplants on Oct 14, 2008 16:24:27 GMT 1
Nope......but I am being VERY polite.... Of course I am NOT saying that the reason men are never depressed is because they (some of them) aren't very bright........I would never even think such a ridiculous thing... Oh alright then!! ;D I must admit, what Jennifer went through earlier, I don't think I could have put up with. Why is it though, that most women have trouble with electrical equipment these days. Every time my SiL gets something new, like a VCR, it's Keeeeeiiiiiiiiiith, when can you come to tune it in for me. There is an instruction booklet with it, can't you read!!
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Post by debbiem on Oct 14, 2008 16:46:42 GMT 1
Nope......but I am being VERY polite.... Of course I am NOT saying that the reason men are never depressed is because they (some of them) aren't very bright........I would never even think such a ridiculous thing... Oh alright then!! ;D I must admit, what Jennifer went through earlier, I don't think I could have put up with. Why is it though, that most women have trouble with electrical equipment these days. Every time my SiL gets something new, like a VCR, it's Keeeeeiiiiiiiiiith, when can you come to tune it in for me. There is an instruction booklet with it, can't you read!! We let you do all that so you can all feel clever and important. ;D
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Post by debbiem on Oct 14, 2008 17:49:46 GMT 1
Ooo I love a good old fashioned debate between the sexes.......come on then? AND Men NEVER have to endure periods or the menopause (and don't anyone dare say they have to endure ours.....or else....) Oh yes forgot to mention. Men shouldn't be any where near the opposite sex, when it's the wrong time of the month! Just remember it's the wrong time for both!! Do you think I got away with it, OB? Women would be fine at THAT time of the month if only the pesky men would stay away! They only take advantage of the situation to have a pop and say it's all our fault. If men had a time of the month you'd be allowed to stay off work and go down the pub with it.
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Post by debbiem on Oct 16, 2008 9:37:15 GMT 1
Unless it's my OH who feverishly reads the manual as fast as he can and then 'loses' it, so we all have to rely on his intense impressive knowledge of whatever the appliance is.
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Post by madonplants on Oct 16, 2008 10:28:35 GMT 1
Oh alright then!! ;D I must admit, what Jennifer went through earlier, I don't think I could have put up with. Why is it though, that most women have trouble with electrical equipment these days. Every time my SiL gets something new, like a VCR, it's Keeeeeiiiiiiiiiith, when can you come to tune it in for me. There is an instruction booklet with it, can't you read!! But when it comes to the washing machine most men don't even know it comes with an instruction book! ;D Why do you need an instruction booklet, they all work roughly the same, don't they? Check temperture of items to be washed and set on dial, put wash 'tablet' and anti run cloth in drum, then clothes and hit the 'on' buttom. Why do you need a booklet for that? ;D
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Post by madonplants on Oct 16, 2008 13:31:03 GMT 1
Why do you need an instruction booklet, they all work roughly the same, don't they? Check temperture of items to be washed and set on dial, put wash 'tablet' and anti run cloth in drum, then clothes and hit the 'on' button. Why do you need a booklet for that? ;D ..... anti run cloth : - say no more! LOL and you forgot to add fabric conditioner (not recommended when washing towels btw). Hitting the on button on my machine just puts power to it, the start button is what's needed to get it washing ........ : ;D Jennifer bought, after she had a problem, not ME!! It just gets used as a matter of course, nowadays, unless the machine is set for tumble dry, then it's left out, obviously!! Fabric conditioner included in 'tablet'! No point in using extra, saves money, too! Our towels still come out OK, even the ones for Souki, which obviously get really dirty, especially at this time of the year! Yes, we do have a power button as well as an 'on' button, wouldn't go otherwise, would it? When you press the power light, all lovely lights come on and flash at you! Sometimes I wonder whether I should flash back at them!!
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Post by mickthecactus on Oct 16, 2008 16:40:48 GMT 1
The witch, I think that is pretty accurate.....
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Post by cheerypeabrain on Oct 16, 2008 18:01:20 GMT 1
My OH will put the washing in the machine AND peg it out, he will occasionally hoover the stairs if my hayfever is bad and cooks a wonderful egg and chips. He would never DREAM of ironing, cleaning the bathroom & toilet, changing the bed linen or shopping with more than his own needs in mind. BUT he is soooo gorgeous and amiable, seems to be able to fix anything electrical (except for flat screen tvs) and will knock up a raised bed, CF, bookshelf etc at the drop of a hat that the failure to complete certain chores are of no consequence at all He has other qualities too.
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Post by debbiem on Oct 17, 2008 9:27:34 GMT 1
Mine's lovely too, an electrical and mechanical wizard, he can cook, be domestic, lump around heavy stuff, he's an expert carpenter and he knows so much - that's the problem, he knows so much and wants to share it with everyone, bless, even if they're not interested! And his good qualities far outweigh all the irritating bits - he's a thoroughly good egg all round.
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Post by mickthecactus on Oct 17, 2008 12:47:49 GMT 1
Oh Dear....
I'm not toobad - a decent cook and can do most other things if I have to ther than ironing.
But not great at mens things - cars are pretty alien to me, DIY isn't my strong point although I'm not bad at painting and decorating.
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Post by madonplants on Oct 17, 2008 14:37:36 GMT 1
Oh Dear.... I'm not toobad - a decent cook and can do most other things if I have to ther than ironing. But not great at mens things - cars are pretty alien to me, DIY isn't my strong point although I'm not bad at painting and decorating. Would Mrs C, say the same thing? Oh, you mean the car and decorating thing, sooooorrryyy! ;D I wouldn't say I was brilliant (or even good) at anything, but that's me, I suppose. I will do the washing, hoovering, dusting, ironing even, though we both hate the latter! TBH, the iron hardly comes out in this household, unless it really needs to! I'm not good at cooking, but will get by with easy things. I was OK at school, never getting less than 9.5/10, but it was cake and dessert making, not proper cooking, as I call it. I am not a bad decorator, but hate high ceilings. I'll do DIY in our house as well as SiL's and her/our friend in Nottingham. I've never had any complaints, well maybe one. I had to re hang a curtain rail, as in my view, it wasn't straight. Jennifer was happy with it, so it annoyed her that I had to take it down, fill the holes, re drill and put it back up again, straight. With help from my counsellor, I'm better at that now. The, not worrying if it is a millimetre out, bit! Cars, I used to do work on to a degree, but now they are too complicated and the need for specialised tools, means it's best left to the professionals. Maybe that's why I can't wait until Craig gets his first car, I will be able to use my socket set again, especially if it's an old Ford!! I hate food shopping, Jennifer doesn't let me near any present wrapping, but I did clean out the toilets this morning!!
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Post by debbiem on Oct 17, 2008 15:46:10 GMT 1
Toilets in the plural? Blimey, how many have you got there?
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Post by madonplants on Oct 17, 2008 16:43:19 GMT 1
Toilets in the plural? Blimey, how many have you got there? Just two, three if you count the garden, not that I cleaned that up though!!
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Post by debbiem on Oct 17, 2008 17:18:27 GMT 1
Toilets in the plural? Blimey, how many have you got there? Just two, three if you count the garden, not that I cleaned that up though!! ;D
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Post by Sweetleaf on Oct 19, 2008 20:44:25 GMT 1
Men do get depressed! If their team loses, they go into a downward spiral, for instance Other things usually go right over their heads, because we women do all the worrying for them, theres no need to get depressed or stressed, simple. It is funny The witch, and most of its hits the nail right on the head!
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